Walking The Walk...
I am no different from other people, and my life had always had its perks and challenges. But I truly enjoyed the perks I actually earned and never asked for a magic wand to overcome the challenges… until four years ago. But the magic wand is a creation of fairytales, and I had no choice but to turn to recources within…
I am no different from other people, and my life had always had its perks and challenges. But I truly enjoyed the perks I actually earned and never asked for a magic wand to overcome the challenges… until four years ago. But the magic wand is a creation of fairytales, and I had no choice but to turn to recources within…
I was broken hearted and powerless. The wellbeing of my
three-year-old boy depended on me, but I had no tools. I could not comprehend
what autism really was, this disease made no sense. There was no pill that
could make everything go back to normal again. I read books and articles until
I could not process their words any more. I googled the topic until the same
pages would come up over and over again. I sought people who walked the walk
that was ahead of me asking them for advice. I lived and breathed the world of
autism.
So what is it and where it comes from, you ask? No one
knows, really. I read that autism
affects the development of a person’s communication and social interaction
skills. Some researchers say that people with autism have a delayed mirror
neuron system. This is a brain circuit that enables us to better understand,
anticipate and copy the actions of others.
Wait… as I read this, I suddenly realized why everyone says
that early intervention is so important. Maybe it is because young age is the time when a human actually learns how to live and
operate in life by mirroring it. And, if a person’s ability to mirror life is
delayed, then we have to start artificially teaching this little human
everything about our life, so they can gain tools to know how to live in this
world. We all hear that people with autism have this incredible memory ability.
And how could they not, they have to memorize everything that others simply
mirror!
But how can we teach someone everything about life?
…People say it takes a village to raise a child, and they
could not be more right… Varuzh and I could never do it on our own! And we are
eternally grateful to everyone we met as we walked the walk!
Day in and day out, Alex’s therapists and behavioral
specialists would work with him and us, explaining how his mind works and
equipping us with tools of parenting a child who thinks… differently. Most of
the therapists were in their mid twenties if not younger, and Varuzh and I were
admiring them and listening to their advice diligently, learning how to teach
Alex all the necessary skills of independence - how to dress, or brush teeth,
or wash hands, or how to stop his body from wiggling due to sensitivity, or how
to respond to his name, or how to look people in the eye, or how to react in
different life situations… But, the most valuable lesson Varuzh and I got from
Alex’s therapists was to learn to be patient and compassionate. We learned to
work for months on a simple little skill such as swallowing a spoonful of
blended soup, and learning to celebrate every achievement. No achievement was
little!
“Sun is off,” Alex said as we were gazing at stars during an
August summer night.
I smiled. Alex’s ability to speak has returned within about
a half a year after we started working with him, and since then, he has been
treating us with his funny statements that probably are results of thinking in
pictures...
“Look at me, Alex.” I said hoping that he would turn in
response to his name and keep eye contact with me for few seconds. And when he
turned to me, I gave him a big kiss, and I was so happy that hours, days,
weeks, months and years of hard work were paying off.
We certainly walked the tough walk. But Alex was on his way
to recovery and I felt so lucky, lucky that he had the ability and strength
within him to fight this battle against autism. I could never ask for anything
more. I did not need the magic wand any longer…
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